MISTAKES

We are human beings and we make mistakes. None of us is perfect. The mistakes we make, make us who we are. They become more of experiences. Making mistakes help us to grow and discover who we truly are. Mistakes teach us to value life and be happy. It doesn't matter how the mistake was made, what matters is how we fix it and what you learned from it. Mistakes happen because of either the bad decisions we make or just lack of knowledge.

There are many mistakes that we make but I will just talk about a few. At the end of this I also want you to make a list of the mistake you have made, how you fixed them and what you learnt from them or identify the ones that you are making today and how you can fix them. The perfect way of handling a mistake is admitting that you are making a mistake, not to repeat the mistake (fix the mistake) and learning from them.

• Fear --- Here am talking about fear to speak up because one thinks that her/his ideas are irrelevant compared to others, fear to start a business because one thinks of losses (what if it doesn't work out), fear to enrol into certain courses/programs thinking they are tough and only meant for some people, fear to let things go etc. 

FIX: One, the rich and important people in the world took a risk at some point in their lives and that's why they are who they are now, successful. Don't be afraid to take a risk and make a mistake. Two, always speak up when you think your idea may be of help to someone or something. Don't be afraid to be YOU. Three, you are able to do anything when you put your mind and effort into it. 

Let me clarify something here though, not everything is for you (not everything will work for you) so make sure you know what works for you (identify what works for you) and that you are happy doing it. You will always be happy and passionate doing something that you like. 

• Please other people --- Focusing more on what makes other people happy. Focusing more on pleasing others thus neglecting oneself. People pleasers never say "no". By being a person who would rather please others always, one welcomes depression and stress, one tends to neglect to take care of him/herself, fear of being rejected if one says "no" and also one allows him/herself to be taken advantage of. 

FIX: Don't get me wrong, you can be nice to people/help when you can. Don't let your nice-being self be your sadness or stress. Don't be afraid to say "no" when you know it's not time to do something or can't do something at the time. If someone does not appreciate what you do for him/her or wants constant attention, he/she is not a good person. I mean never let anyone take advantage of you. Always take care of you too. 

• Bad spending --- Spending money on things one doesn't really need or are not necessary. Spending as much as we earn or more, use the savings that one has and so forth. (It doesn't matter that one is employed, a student or a business person). 

FIX: You have to learn how to save money. Save it for future, use it for necessary things. Ask yourself these questions? "What if I drink once a week instead of every single day of a week?",  "What if I don't buy that dress?", "What if I don't buy that handbag even though my friend is the one selling it?", "What if I stop making unnecessary trips and save fuel?". Think of how much you will save. 

• Bad relationships --- Enduring that one bad relationship at one time in life or still doing it. Having that group of friends or a friend who have or has been bad influence in one's life or still having them today. Letting other people determine what kind of life one should live and that's so wrong. 

FIX: Learn to let go of bad relationships/friendships. What's the point of being in a relationship with someone who abuses you? What's the point of having that friend or group of friends who bring nothing but unfortunates in your life?. Know your worth. Tell yourself that you are better than them. Learn to move on. 

• Forget where one comes from --- Here am talking about one usually tends to forget where he/she comes from and neglects people who helped him/her at some point in life (could be parents, boss, neighbour, friend etc) or ignores the good advice one gets just because today he/she is too educated and knows everything, today one owns he/she own things, today one is stable financially, today one is the boss. Some people even go beyond living a lie. This is when one pretends to be this person he/she is not. 

FIX: Never ever neglect someone who helped you (even if its a single time in life). Have the courtesy to appreciate what other people do for you however small the help is. Could be he/she paid for your school fees or offered you a position somewhere or offered you a place to live or offered you money to start your business. If you have made this mistake, do apologize NOW. You do not know what the future holds. Keep in mind that you do not know everything however the level of education you are at. Never ever live a lie, accept yourself, count your blessing and be grateful, and love who you are. People will appreciate the person you are. 

• Incomplete studies --- Seen people drop out of school for no important reason. I say no important reason because all I hear is, "school is tough and not for me", "most successful people dropped out of school before they became successful", "i wanna make money sooner" etc. 

FIX: Sweetheart, let me tell you this. People are different. What worked for one person does not necessarily mean it will work for you. I do not doubt that there are people who are bad in school but do better in life. This is why I started by saying people are different. Think about this, in school you learn a lot. Do not enrol into a course that is not helpful to you. Am sure whatever you learn in school will help you in life somehow. This can come from the courses you take or the experiences you gain by just being in school. Again, think of the people paying your school fees. You can only show appreciation by making an effort. You do not know what the future holds. You may just give up a golden opportunity just because you did not complete your studies. 

• Making lame excuses --- Another big mistake is this one. Every time one wants to start something, he/she gives so many excuses, "This is not for me", "Am too lazy", "I do not know where to start", "Let someone else do this" and so forth. 

FIX: I have spoken about lame excuses on my previous posts. All I can say is, FIX THIS. Take risks, take a step forward, make mistakes, things have a way of falling into place once effort is applied. You are your own biggest enemy of success. 

• Comparing yourself to others --- Biggest mistake one can make is comparing her/himself to others. One cares too much about what others think of him/her. This can lower one's self esteem, confidence, bring fear to voice his/her opinions. 

FIX: Accept and love yourself. If you do that, you will never feel like you fall short. Fine! There are wrong things you do as you are not perfect and when people tell you that you are wrong, you should care about that. Besides, am sure you are old enough to know what's good and what's bad. But don't care when people criticize when your business fails or that you don't own a car or a house etc. Always know that your time is coming. 

As I said earlier, there are so many mistakes we make in life. I can't mention each and every mistake but you, yourself, know where you are going wrong. FIX IT. 

Don't beat yourself up for making mistakes. Remember the biggest mistake you make is by not making mistakes. "MISTAKES IS THE PROOF THAT YOU ARE TRYING".

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Author: Rachel Stephen

Joche Inspirational and Motivational Inc.

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